Burn: Movies and mental health

Burn: Movie and Mental Health

This is a very interesting movie. You will enjoy this thriller.

Melinda is the lead character and she is fabulously played by Tilda Cobham-Hervey.

We realise that Melinda is a person who is humble, polite and friendly. She wants to help people and always has a smile on her face. However, she is treated by others with disdain, rudeness or insults. In American lingo, Melinda would be a ‘doormat’ or a ‘pin cushion’ who others use to vent out their frustrations and anger knowing well that Melinda will not reciprocate as strongly as she should. The customer who is smoking while at the pump, abuses and shouts at Melinda when she rightfully points out that he shouldn’t be smoking while filling his car with gas. The (unseen) previous shift worker who has left without cleaning the bathroom, again. Sheila, the co-worker, who films Melinda, without her consent, and refuses to delete the video. Then the customer who isn’t interested in Melinda, even when she makes a friendly gesture AFTER he has been rudely put off by Shelia.

Melinda is a person, who is interested in people but others are not responding in the way she expects. A problem that is perpetually exacerbated in today’s society where likes and favourites determine your social status.

In Melinda’s words: “people don’t usually give me the chance, to get to know me”! Melinda is sad and unhappy inside, but she doesn’t have the awareness of being lonely, without friends, and neither does she realise that the problem is partly within herself and partly in the people/society we live among. Psychiatrists have almost always pointed out that having a close relationship with another person, one with whom emotional sharing is possible openly; is the best preventive measure to save oneself from bad mental health.

Soon, we see Melinda putting her finger in hot coffee and I realise that there is a problem. Self-harm is your mind’s call for help. It is an indication that the emotions and feelings are taking control of behaviour and thoughts and inflicting physical pain seems to be a response of the mind to escape the mental pain. Later, Melinda says “I burn myself all the time”! She however, doesn’t understand that it is a sign to see a mental health professional. We can gradually help you in evaluating why the self-harm thought/behaviour emerges, when it may come out, and what damage it is doing to the body and mind. Over a period of time, as the therapist and you begin to trust each other and open up much more, the links between mood, emotions, feelings on the one hand and  thoughts and behaviour become clearer. Then some problems can be solved or new coping skills can be learnt.

The thrill of the movie starts, when a handsome man comes into the gas-station to rob the money. Melinda’s thought process takes off on a different tangent altogether, as she offers to bring the money from the safe for the robber but then wants to go with him!! Seems hilarious at first, but the essence of Melinda’s mind is that she is unable to come up with reasonable and rational responses to unplanned incidents. This again is known to be a bother for many of those who are fighting with mental disorders. As long as life is stable, routine and predictable; mood and behaviour too is fine. But, when any change occurs especially suddenly, then responses can be of fear, withdrawal, avoidance or as in Melinda’s case, unreasonable recklessness! Life goes out of control from that moment.

Even while Melinda comes to terms with the robber’s refusal to take her with him, her anger takes over and for the first time, perhaps, Melinda acts forcefully. After pouring lots of coffee on her hand, perhaps to stabilise her emotional whirlpool of pain, misery and loneliness; she gets control of the situation! The robber is bound and it is time to find out “Why didn’t you want me to go with you?” She doesn’t call the police, even though she has a dead body on her hands, instead she cleans up and waits for the robber to regain consciousness. “Why didn’t you just leave with me then,” is her refrain while interviewing the tied and bound man.

Unfortunately, that is how some hurt and unwell minds work. In Melinda’s mind, the attempted robbery and Sheila’s death are less imperative than the reason of why this ‘relationship’ between her and the robber didn’t start. Maybe it is also about having control for the first time with another person! It is during this conversation between Melinda and Billy that we find out how out of sync with reality Melinda’s thoughts are.

1. · She talks about gas stations as community gathering centres and how she meets many people daily during her shift. It is in response to a question by Billy as to whether Melinda is unhappy with her life. We mental health professionals term such ‘beliefs’ as schemas which serve to protect the mind from the pain of accepting that life is unhappy and hence one goes around with the imagination of doing something great and hence being happy.
2. · She also talks of fire as “forcing things to change” and it “heals (things) back to what it was”.

Her awkward attempt at having sex with the gagged and bound robber after giving him some stimulating drugs also fails and perhaps that is when Melinda realises that she is alone and even this ‘relationship’ does not exist. We see her with the money and the gun, contemplating shooting herself but unable to do so.

One bad decision after another leads to further spiral downwards for Melinda. She looks for an escape plan-bury the bodies, perhaps? But the bikers arrive and Melinda’s lack of social communication skills are demonstrated again, when she asks them “do you guys do illegal things. . . . . . accidentally kill people and get rid of dead bodies?” Then, when she pulls a gun, on a group of bikers (!), they ask her “Have you lost your f…ing mind,” Melinda replies “it is quite possible” (!) So, awareness without understanding, mental health is not all that good, realises Melinda. The bikers leave, after making Melinda realise that there are cameras everywhere!

When the mind is not fully well, we take risks, right! We see Melinda with a cigarette in her mouth, filling petrol in cans from the pump. Officer Liu arrives, stalling the plan for a while, and Melinda further reveals to us her mental state; she doesn’t trust the officer when he says he cares for her and wants to make sure that she is safe. Melinda mentions, ‘You don’t need to say that . . . . . . . you are just doing your job . . . . . . . . you never told me these things before. . . . . .  so there is no need to say it now, it is too late!’

By the end of the movie though Officer Liu comes on Melinda’s call and Melinda feels that he was telling the truth earlier-(about caring for her and wanting to keep her safe).

You can decide what you feel for Melinda- sympathy, empathy, pity, compassion or understanding. Or are you one of those who has disdain, disappointment, and you feel that she should be tried for her part in the crime! 

I would root for helping Melinda (and people who are awkward, termed eccentric and cruelly called freaks). I would also strongly object to those who (like Sheila and other characters) mistreat and emotionally abuse people who are not a good fit into our social communication patterns. Be polite and friendly to everyone, it doesn’t hurt and by caring for Melinda, you will be reinforcing the trust in human society that we do care!!

Dr Maneesh Gupta

Psychiatrist and Psychotherapist

Gemini Man: Movies and Mental health

Will Smith starrer Gemini Man is an action Film and yet you can see elements of mental health, especially the influence of the mind on behaviour. (Spoiler Alert)

Henry, the lead actor wants to retire because “after 72 kills”

         He feels doubts (If I am 6 inches off, she is dead!)

         He doesn’t feel as confident on himself as he should, or as he used to (This time, I got lucky),

         He doesn’t find it as comfortable as before  (I didn’t feel the shot-not like I should have),

         He feels hurt by what he is doing, even though it is patriotic freelancing (72 kills. . . . . that shit starts to mess with you a bit, deep down its like my soul is hurt, I just want some peace, I’m finding myself avoiding mirrors lately, I take that as a sign) A sign that he needs to see a Psychiatrist

All these feelings are natural but when they begin to interfere in your work and make you feel bad despite no rational reason, then the science of Psychiatry says it is an aberration that we need to assess and treat, make it go away so that you can make a choice to continue and be as productive as before.

While an army man or a sniper (even if he is a freelancer) does kill people, it is done on the grounds of patriotism and to save the country from the evil forces of the enemy. It is also possible to make mistakes and feel bad or guilty about it, but should we let the emotions cloud the judgement?! Psychiatrists help remove the associated emotions and thus clear the mind to make a rational choice. We do this through a combination of medicines and therapy. More importantly, medical science has shown that the content of thoughts is not as important as is the emotional impact of those thoughts.

Thus, I have helped people struggling with the work they do in a multinational FMCG company -  ‘why am I selling biscuits and washing powder’, or a Lawyer working with families - ‘there is so much dispute between loved ones - what is the use of marrying and having a family’, or even a local political leader who has had a criminal background - ‘why do I hurt people, threaten them,  make them fear me; let me leave all this and go and do penance (Hindu spirituality way)’! In all and more of such emotional problems, I have helped people get back their focus, their mojo and to do the same things they were doing earlier in as good and as enjoyable a mood as before.

For any person to have self doubt, to question self as to why I am doing this; is not bad but the difference in it being a disorder is in the impact it has on the life of the individual and the loved ones/family. More often than not, a possibility of such guilt or remorse being a mental illness, the emotional negativity that such doubts have and the pervasiveness of self blame is an indicator of whether we can change and restore the status as before or not.

The company/organisation one works for can pick up on the signals of a self doubting individual. The lack of pleasure of work is apparent in day to day interactions. The lack of productivity is gleaned by the managers and senior colleagues, who may be supportive initially but will constantly nudge you to get rid of ‘holding back’ attitude. In the movie, we hear why: A human can feel “Tired, fear, pain perhaps remorse, conscience, but sub-optimal as a soldier, less perfect, less profitable” and it is hence that machines (or clones) are replacing humans! Mental health preservation is thus an essential tool to remain productive (and profitable).

If one has misgivings about Henry having emotional problems, one needs to look at the latter half of the movie where he talks about his insomnia: “the Mind never sleeps, and even when it does it attacks you with nightmares, I am talking about those 3 o’ clock nightmares, somebody please save me kind of nightmares, then there’s the doubts, those are the worst, you hate them, they make you feel weak, you hate them and hate how they make you feel ………..   real soldier doesn’t doubt” Substitute the word ‘Man’ instead of soldier and you have a toxic behavior of denying and minimising emotional problems, behavioral problems, and thinking problems. Regrettably, this denial is much more often in men and is one of the biggest reasons why the numbers of men dying by suicide is double that of women dying by suicide. Men will not talk about their feelings and will not tell their men friends to seek help for emotional stuff. Psychiatrists have long been asking men to open up and to talk, not to let feelings bottle up, and not to give up!

In the movie we also get to see how Henry felt as he was growing up and how parenting was an issue for him. One of the negative themes in many people who are struggling with emotions and thoughts, is about how they recall their childhood as not being particularly pleasant. Here Henry recalls his mother: ‘Woman whipped my ass, father left when I was five, every time she saw me, she felt like I looked like him’.

He goes on to tell us a little about his growing up life: ‘made first friends in the army, shooting medals, and going on since then……..couldn’t stop’, ‘the only time you ever feel happy is when you are flat on a belly about to squeeze the trigger and at that time everything makes sense’, AND ‘still a virgin dying to be in a relationship but terrified to let anybody near you, what if somebody actually saw who you are because how could they love you, so everybody is a target!’

These are terrible experiences, revealing the pain and suffering that a person such as Henry has undergone. The emotional understanding that this was what I was feeling when I was younger, is not easy and doesn’t come till later. More often than not, it is something that therapy helps you realise, accept and come to terms with. It is only then (after the acceptance) that mental health professionals can actually take you on a recovery journey and help you change and become different than what you have become.  

The movie ends with a positive message of a change in the younger/cloned Will Smith. What I hope you learn is that you can stop and become who you want to be: a student, a player, a son, a friend or a younger brother. Anything, but it can be done. You can become a better person!

Dr Maneesh Gupta

Psychiatrist and Psychotherapist

Cafe Coffee Day Founder is Missing: A Psychiatrist's perspective

VG Siddhartha, Café Coffee Day Founder has been missing since 6 PM on 29^th July, 2019. A letter he purportedly sent to the board dated 27^th July also surfaced as day broke on 30^th July.

As a Psychiatrist, I find the letter holds strong pointers to the mental state of Siddhartha, when he wrote it.

The words “Today I gave up” and “lead to me succumbing to the situation” are RED FLAG signs. These indicate to me as a mental health professional that Siddhartha had lost hope, and was possibly contemplating ending his life.

The language of ‘giving up’ and of ‘succumbing’ is typical of depressed individuals who are strongly considering suicide as an end to a ‘failed life’. Ominously, Siddhartha’s letter mentions mistake: “I am solely responsible for all mistakes”; failure: “I have failed as an entrepreneur”; and asks for forgiveness: “You will understand, forgive, and pardon me”. These are constructs that Depression, an illness, makes people think, feel and behave in. Sadly, the chemical changes due to Depression make a person feel that s/he is a failure despite it not being so (or at worst failure being a temporary setback). Depression makes a person think only of the mistakes that have (or haven’t) happened, and it clouds the person’s ability to balance the negatives in life with the positives in life. Once 

Depression has made such deep inroads into the mind, it creates an illusion of no respite, no escape and no solution to the difficult situation that one finds him/herself in. That is when hope vanishes and an individual decides to take his/her own life. Suicide, the draconian 7 letter fatal word, is the outcome. A decision and a plan is made and then such a letter is written in which one tends to ask for understanding, forgiveness and pardon.

The above sequence of mental events are known to happen with such ferocity, recurrence and sustenance that without the help of a Psychiatrist, life is lost to an irreversible act of self-harm. Jumping in a river, lake or from a bridge to end one’s life is an unfortunate incident that we term as suicide.

I have expressed my fears, based only on Siddhartha’s letter. I hope I am wrong. For his sake and for the sake of his family, I hope he is found alive. Help can then be provided by reassurance, by family support, and most importantly by starting medicines which can change the chemical milieu of the brain.

Antidepressants are life savers. Disappointingly, people don’t believe in Psychiatrists and medicines. Sadly, this leads to late consultations with a Psychiatrist (or no consultation at all) and the result is death by Suicide. While, the person suffering from depression, is understandably bereft of hope and belief, it is the family and friends who should strongly encourage seeking help from a Psychiatrist and work towards reassuring and igniting hope in the person. Our prescription has saved a million lives BUT we lose more than a million lives to people not coming to a psychiatrist or not following our advice.

Another aspect that the financial media and the business people are talking about is the ‘pressure’ and ‘harassment’ that Siddhartha was apparently subjected to, and which they are claiming was ‘responsible’ for him taking such a step and writing such a letter. This is not the right perspective. Pressures and harassments are faced by many people across the world, everyday! These can be different for different individuals, based on their socio economic status.

“Succumbing’ to pressures is NOT fully dependent on either the person’s inherent mental strength or the degree of the stress that is inflicted (or by whom). The negative mindset that prevents any solutions from being found, implemented or even being hopeful of, is characteristic of Depression. I repeat, Depression, the chemical illness of the brain that effects the way one thinks, feels and behaves.

“There is no solution”, “I will never be able to get out of this situation”, “I am a failure”: these are known to be overwhelming thoughts due to depression. It is the negative focus of the brain that is the problem and this is because of a chemical change in the brain which is treatable. In Siddhartha’s case, the company’s balance sheet is not bad, infact it is better that a lot of other companies who have defaulted on their payments and have assets lesser than the debt on their books. This is acknowledged by Siddhartha in his letter too. Yet, his mind focuses on the battles he has had to fight with the PE player and the DG Tax earlier. The tax battle was over. Yet, Siddhartha is still thinking about it, futilely, repeatedly, because of depression.

Depression, saps the mental energy out of the individual, makes one feel that solutions cannot be arrived at, and the mind seems to hit a brick wall, repeatedly. Once again, I reiterate, feeling hopeless about any positive change of the situation is an index of depression and NOT of the external situation that one is exposed to. Treat Depression and you become capable of finding solutions once again. I have done so with many individuals and I am sure that almost all Psychiatrist have helped people reclaim their lives.

Please, when you feel hopeless, do consult a Psychiatrist.

PS: Special note to media persons reading this: Kindly discuss depression on your media with just as much passion and zeal as you are putting in to talk about the business challenges that Siddhartha was facing. You will save lives!

Dr Maneesh Gupta, Psychiatrist.